3. Sweet Sound Of Validation

One of the first steps of recovery has been therapy. Just that sweet, simple act of stepping through the door.

When I am in that room I am doing something for me. I am no longer alone. When I am in that room, my mother's illness exists, even as most of my family pretends it does not.

Validation is like life blood. I am not crazy like I secretly feared. There is reason for me being this way. There is hope for me changing for the better.

Validation is like gold. Validation is the sound of the starter gun. Solid strength to draw from as I step inside myself and examine all that resides there. Just by stepping through those doors gives me the strength to approach those locked and guarded dungeons inside. I am trying to open them. Some come easily, but others are tougher and some...They are across rivers, beyond cliffs, but I know I will reach them sometime.

The simple act of going to therapy is galvanising. I have taken my life into my own hands and looked down upon it. I am starting to see what I need to do.

By walking in through that door I know I am in a safe environment where I can begin to work myself out. In that room I am no longer afraid of my own voice. I am no longer scared to express the emotions I am struggling to untangle. In that room I am no longer scared to explore everything, good, bad and indifferent within me. In that room I am given unconditional support.

Can you imagine that?

Sometimes I have troubles comprehending.

But I am learning. By simply stepping into that room, receiving the solid, honest validation of where I have come from I am able to keep going, keep searching, keep challenging ingrained beliefs, keep moving forward and changing.

That sweet sound of validation keeps resounding through my head, driving me on. And for that small, honest act, I am able to begin to grow.